having doubts bout you.
i know im thinking too much.
but all these is just cause,
i care.
i dont show.
but,
i do.

/never ending madness over you.




me and chu.
buddies unite.SOTONGS
thanks sidd and cass!love you'll alot!





these are some of the pathetic photos i took of
alfee and with alfee. haha. long time never
go home with her alr.so today she say wait for me, so
went home with her lor.


alFEE and FEE. NO idea wht she was doing.

stupid face!haha : )
HAHAH!

today was rather a fun day.
RECESS.
darn fun.
haha.
alex brought food.
sardines with bread.
then HAM.
not halal.
OH OH OH!
with mayo also.YUMMM!
then after we ate.
they all rushed to the basin to wash their hands.
then i was like huh?
then all of them were like if we dont wash we cant touch you.
HAHA!
darn funny.
then i was like if you wash hands means you halal alr lar!
haha.
then joyce was like NO,our stomache not halal.
OMG.LAUGH LIKE SHIT PLS.
and piggyback lauwisa nearly the whole day today.
haha.
then ENGLISH was RATHER fun.
ms nuraini asked me to read the whole friendship story okaye to the class!
not tired whats.
then some words i accidentally pronounce right.
they all laugh at me k.
so malu!
then LUNCH!
like tht lor.
then test!
WHAT RUBBISH LAR.
THE SIGN??!!?
HALO!!
then my class was like i think got typo error on the question.
hahah!
then worst.
jimin was like why not COSINE.
at least can talk bout maths.
then joyce, why not THE SIGH.
at least can emo emo.
hahahah!
so funny.
after test met alfee.
then yar.
went home with her.
HELLO ALFEE LAW.
suddenly just now my shoulder felt heavy okaye!
then open eyes,
it was YOUR HEAD.
wah sia!
i was too tired to bother.
hahah, then went back to sleep.
yar.
okaye i gues thats all.
sorry cai jasmine.
its been a long time since i went home with al.
and this is the only time.
yeah.
sorry : (
next time k.
: )




these are some of the pathetic photos i took of
alfee and with alfee. haha. long time never
go home with her alr.so today she say wait for me, so
went home with her lor.


alFEE and FEE. NO idea wht she was doing.

stupid face!haha : )
HAHAH!

today was rather a fun day.
RECESS.
darn fun.
haha.
alex brought food.
sardines with bread.
then HAM.
not halal.
OH OH OH!
with mayo also.YUMMM!
then after we ate.
they all rushed to the basin to wash their hands.
then i was like huh?
then all of them were like if we dont wash we cant touch you.
HAHA!
darn funny.
then i was like if you wash hands means you halal alr lar!
haha.
then joyce was like NO,our stomache not halal.
OMG.LAUGH LIKE SHIT PLS.
and piggyback lauwisa nearly the whole day today.
haha.
then ENGLISH was RATHER fun.
ms nuraini asked me to read the whole friendship story okaye to the class!
not tired whats.
then some words i accidentally pronounce right.
they all laugh at me k.
so malu!
then LUNCH!
like tht lor.
then test!
WHAT RUBBISH LAR.
THE SIGN??!!?
HALO!!
then my class was like i think got typo error on the question.
hahah!
then worst.
jimin was like why not COSINE.
at least can talk bout maths.
then joyce, why not THE SIGH.
at least can emo emo.
hahahah!
so funny.
after test met alfee.
then yar.
went home with her.
HELLO ALFEE LAW.
suddenly just now my shoulder felt heavy okaye!
then open eyes,
it was YOUR HEAD.
wah sia!
i was too tired to bother.
hahah, then went back to sleep.
yar.
okaye i gues thats all.
sorry cai jasmine.
its been a long time since i went home with al.
and this is the only time.
yeah.
sorry : (
next time k.
: )









i was blog-hopping,
friendster hopping.
stuff like tht ah.
i rlly rlly salute those of them who get who they want.
be with them.
have happy times.
you know?
brother and me talked bout it before.
how we wish.
just how we wish.
its like tht.
but yeah,
im okaye with wht i have now.
my friends,
they are all i need.




its like not tht i dont care.
i mean im not good at showing.
and also.
i dont wanna disturb you.
you say you bad mood.
i worried.
i care.
but i scared if i keep chatting to you.
or msg you,
you'll be like"wah!this fee ah.pissing my life!"
dont want tht to happen.
i mean.
im scared ill irritate you.
i may not be good in consoling,
but just want want you to know tht,
you can always like,
vent on me or smething ah.
as long as you wont be so moody.
yea?
i knw you wont give a darn bout wht i say even if you read ah.
but just thought you should know.
bye




here i am.
rushing on my homework.
okaye shant talk much.
yar.
had cca fair.
shout like shit.
and now can say bye bye to my voice alr.
shish man!
sucks.
throat hurts like shit.
karma man.
cause i kept laughing on those who lost their voices.
haha




even though we'll go in a crowd,
everytime your around,
and we play together,
everything seem to freeze,
except for us,
having fun,
doing our usual stupid stuffs.
well,
have you encountered tht before?
well i did.




have you ever been caught in a dilemma?
one time when you dont know whats going on.
why it happened and all.
and you are being caught in between.
between a person you practically have strong feelings for,
and a person whom you care alot(as your sister).
if you were to pick one,
who would you choose?

please dont let me be in this situation lar.
sick of it.


you,
im tired lar.
you want to talk talk,
you dont want i wont force.
cause it seems tht everything i do is wrong.
im not saying im blaming you.
its im the stupid one.
never think before i act.
but everytime i say sorry,
you will still be angry.
either dont acknowledge my msg or tantrum.
so i guess,
i kinda am very tired.
but i really am sorry for being stupid ah.
i would never purposely hurt your feelings lar.
if you dont know tht by now, then i rly have nth to say ah.
but come on,
my feelings are obvious for you to see.
i know you know all these while.
but yours arent.
and im SLOW.
so i mean,
yalar.
okaye lar.
sorry for getting on your nerves lar.
a yar.
im sick of all these.
im tired.
bye.

/but my love has never end, and will not.(as yet)




sorry for comparing.
sorry.
im just sick of the small quarrels.
can we dont?
and last thing i wanna say,
shes nothing compared to you.
NOTHING,
and i want you,
not her.




if only you were here,
yeah if only.
if only you would show you care,
yeah if only.
if only you would show how much i mean to you,
yeah, if only again.
this feeling,
is not what i choose to have or go through.
just when your near me,
ill down on my knees for you.
we always go out in a group.
but when we have fun,
its like the whole world just pause,
except for us.
why?
my heart beats fast when your near me.
why?
its like not as if i know you for the firsttime or something.
these questions always run thorugh my head.
well till now,
its the same.
SHE.
she always shows me im so freaking important in her life.
you.
you dont say a word.
but i know your still the one i choose.
if it was her,
all those months wont be wasted.
get it?
well i dont.














i dont know
i dont know what shes after
but shes so beautiful
such a beautiful disaster

but if i could hold on
through the tears and the laughters
lord would it be beautiful
or would it be sucha beautiful disaster

THEY ARE BACK FROM CAMP!!!
: )
some people ah come back only bully people.
eeyer.
I MISS CAI AND JASSY!
we were like so drama lar pls when we saw each other.
haha.
run towards each other.
HAHA.
then we talk talk talk.
then went coro.
yeah.
ANYWAYS,
ALFEE BUYING ME TAMAGUTCHI!
YAY!
WOOHOO!
DARN HAPPY LAR PLS!
AT LAST A TAMAGUTCHI!
erm anybody can sponsor for brother?
hee.
cause everytime i have some toy,
she'll have the same one.
hee.
HAPPY HAPPY!!
THANKS ALFEE!
LOVES.




is this enough to show i 'DIDNT' miss you?
hahah. and im NOT cheekopek! i was shocked on wht you gave.
haha : ) faster come back

couldnt think of wht to put it with.you just gave me the shirt.so..... the OHSOSMART me, make it as my pillow cover. hahah. smart right? haha. the smell is gone alr lar pls. haha. joyce say "is EUPHORIA the perfume brand?NICE NICE." hahah. ANYWAYS, wht you doing now ah. i dont know. cai just called. hope your all doing fine. i know you all cant see this. but take care you guys! : ) try to have FUN!

/here i am, missing you again.

came back today,
and saw my mum and dad at the living room.
wondering wht happened man.
then went to my room.
daddy called for me.
so went out.
then he was like i needa talk to you.
then he talk talk talk.
conclusion.
going abroad studying.
instead of aus,
going to some country.
i think Yemen or smth.
but yea.
doing this for my parents and myself.
so yea.
and its this year.
oh wells,
its my FUTURE we're talking bout here.
im willing to go.
and im kinda like excited?
haha

: )




alfee im gonna miss you too.
and i wont forget you like DUH.
you CRIED?!
hahah.
so funny.
why you cry.
siao zha bo lar you.
ANWYAYS,
yar.
hug ah...
hmm.
let me think bout it first.
hahha.



you are going for camp : (




sorry,
i was being petty mans!
maybe wht cai said was right,
i talk before i think.
sighh.
dont know larr,
bye lar.




is it really hard
to tell me how you feel?
does telling me that
really kill?

i wont exactly know whats in your mind
till you actually tell me
ive got so many things in me
but whats the point if you wont hear me

yea i know its wrong
but since when i EVEN said i wanted to go further
HEY i wont ask for more man
than you, just not to disappear

who cares who and who treats me better
nothing can compete with the times i had with you
well maybe not even her

so,
please i beg of you
just tell me how you feel
be it good or bad
it wont cause a big deal(i guess)



okaye : )??

Labels: e

if only
you could hold on to me like she does


i didnt know you cared
i didnt know you realised
at first i thought all these was a joke
and are part of your lies

i dont know you will get so tensed up
i really didnt mean it
if youve not burst out that day
i wont realised wht i did

why you feel tht way?
why you felt inferior?
why you'll get angry
whenever you see me with her?

why you care so much?
why you even bother?
isit cause now i dont only belong to you,
but also belong to her?

im just confused
on the reasons why you felt that way
on how you reacted to the situation
and what youve said that day

the main point is why are these happening
when your feelings are alr on off thing
im sorry that all these happened
i hope we'll stop fighting



/shish your going for camp!





ALEX POSING WITH SOME STUPID MASK!
HAAA.

BROTHER!!! HAHAH SO FUNNY!

LAUWISA!!! HAHAHAH! FREAKING FUNNY LAR!

CUTE CUTE CASSIE WITH THE SAME MASK!

after school went out with jo karen bidin jassy and caiyan.

ate at SUKI SUSHI. DARN NICE MAN! EATEATEAT! UNTIL WAN VOMIT!

THEY STUFFED ME WITH CREAM PUFF THE WHOLE TIME LAR!

MY GAWD! NOW I DONT WANNA HEAR THE FOOD NAME! AHAH.

AND WE SPENT 118 BUCKS! AHAH! NEARLY NOT ENOUGH MONEY.

HENG JUST NICE SIA. HAHAHA.

went to school, matters got worst. ah ya, long story. dont wish to blog bout it.

but i just want to tell you, that i dont think any jealousy was needed.

ive never thought of anything than friendship with her. thats all.

; cause all these it has only been you

HINT HINT!!
26 JANUARY EVERYONE!!!
AND IM DESPERATE FOR TAMAGUTCHI!!!
HAHAH


this year might be the last year i spend my birthday with you all.
sighh.




used to say 'go with the flow'.
HEY.
how to 'go with the flow' when there's no more 'flow'?
i find it funny.
but yea.
seriously.
NO MORE.
i doubt so there is.


but,
my feelings, i know for sure,
will stay strong.
the day i graduate,
is the day ill stop everything.



i was darn emo yesterday with cai esp.
she want to _________.
i want to _________.
cai its not that i want.
its just tht recently the craving for it is like so much now la.
rly, its not purposely.
AND,
i was thinking bout ALOT of stuff.
how this year went.
what i wasted my time on.
who i met.
and,
sharon cai we all planned so happily how we are gonna celeb next year new year.
it didnt occur to me,
when we celeb next year new year,
it will also mean tht im no longer a st margtians.
no more secondary school student.
things will definitely chnage from there.
sighh.
freaking sad yest lar,
while i was ceiling-ing as usual.
a yar.
i dont know ah.


to cai,
thanks for always entertaining me and bullying me.
and always talking to me at night.
haha.
and also being emo with me and all.
thanks.
ill miss you alot.


to jas,
THANKS ALOT!
for helping me out.
when i got shits and stuff,
you were always there to hear me out.
thanks alot man.
i hope i was abit of help to you too.
im sorry if i was being a bad influence to you.
rly sorry.

to sharon,
thanks for being oneof the BEST friends i ever have.
through all this 4 years in st margs.
even though we dont rly talk in school.
but i know inside,
we are close.
you always listen to me when i have probs.
always there.
thanks man.


to bidin,
thanks for bullying me all the time.
thanks for the BEST birthday gift ever.
thanks for the best suprises.
thanks for being unique.
thanks.


to you,
thanks for the memories we had.
thanks for the stupid time we shared.
thanks for the stupid talks.
all the kickings piggy backings.
all of that.
even though i went through alot.
but it seems tht,
the happy times will somehow cover the bad times.
its really precious to me.
thanks for standing my nonsense.
sorry for disturbing you all the time.
sorry for bugging you too.
it was all unintentionally.
all i wanted was to be there for you.
sorry.

bold italics underline



please.



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